I’ve received a great deal of email from my last blog post and Oregonian article. Share your own father-daughter story with me and my blog readers. You can send it through the blog response here on the site, and feel free to keep your real name out if you please.
So many rich stories are coming my way. Let the world hear them; they are important for other daughters of all ages to experience.
OK; sound off. What is your story? I’ll respond to every post possible.
Is it possible that your website and newspaper column, glorifying the relationship between fathers and daughters, shames or marginalizes women and girls who are fatherless?
I could easily be the poster child for the article . My father
was born in the 1930′s and is South American, having grown up in a home where
the man does what he wants & the women keep to themselves. He marries someone
from there, they came to the states, had 3 daughters ( I am the oldest), and
have been here ever since. The irony is that he is a psychiatrist , but this
cobblers kid does not wear shoes indeed.
I spent the first 15-20 years of my life desperate to be noticed by him. One of
my most vivid memories is one where he mentioned casually that he really likes
Linda Ronstandt and had her vinyl record. So one afternoon, as a young girl, I
painstakingly listened to a lot of the songs and wrote down a lot of the
lyrics and so proudly handed them to him. Back in those days, it involved
picking up the needle and hoping it drops in the right spot on the record to
hear a particular song again. Anyway, I think he woke up from a nap, took the
sheet ,looked at it, mumbled a little , and didn’t pay it much more mind. Silly
the things we remember, but I am now 48 and the neglect and feeling of
unimportance was conveyed to me in silent messages over and over again. My mom
was beyond attentive to me, smothering at times, but weak in the marital
dynamic.
I think by all outwards appearances I am a success story. I am an attorney,
married to a successful guy, 3 smart great kids with a home in a nice neighbor hood. I have 2 teenage boys and an preteen year old
daughter. I married the complete opposite of my father- a noble,good person who
was clueless about women when we married ( no sisters,reserved mother),but who
believed me when I told him he would make or break our daughter. He has an
amazing relationship with her ,has daddy/daughter dates with her, and actually
listens when she jabbers on about make up products or fashion. She is a straight
A student too, and we take pride in her work ethic. She is a much improved
version of myself.
I hope she doesn’t go through the pain I did,which includes past problems with
alcohol,men,to varying degrees.
Anyway,Kevin,not sure why I put that all out there, but you nailed it big time
Not one other part of my life growing up was askew-but the benign yet complete
neglect was enough.
Keep writing !